Why this Mommy is meant for adoption...

I apologize ahead of time if this post is a little bit of rambling and very scatter-brained. It is 10pm on a Friday night, so I am a little sleep deprived, but I just had a thought that I couldn't let slip my mind.

Why I know my heart was made for adoption...

I am an avid blog reader (hence my new desire to be a better blogger myself). Of course, top on my blogs to read are adoption blogs. As I read more and more about families in the adoption process, and more specifically post-adoption I realize my desire only grows more. The blogs I follow are great at being honest. They don't sugar coat things. They tell the truth, both beautiful and ugly. And you know what? None of the ugly scares me away, but only pulls at my heart even more.

I hear about difficulty with attachment, both from the child's and the parent's perspective. Mommies who don't automatically feel an unconditional love for their new child. Babies who don't always want comfort from their new Mommies and Daddies, who after all, are nothing but strangers to them in the beginning. I read about babies grieving their homes thousands of miles away. And you know what? It doesn't scare me away.

It is easy to think "I would be so sad if my baby doesn't let me hold him or comfort him", but what speaks to my heart is how much these babies are hurting. My heart breaks, not for me, but for my baby. That my child will come to me broken hearted. That he/she must be unbelievably brave to cross an ocean with strangers. I know this Momma's heart is meant for adoption because all these "hard" things just makes me want it more. I want to love someone unconditionally, through the good, the bad, and the ugly. It is easy to love those that love you back, but we are called to love even if our circumstances are not filled with butterflies and rainbows.

 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.  And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. -Luke 6:32-33

I know it will be hard. I know there will be times I will be so exhausted and so broken hearted for my child that I will wonder if Reagan and I did the right thing in adopting. But when I get to that point, I hope I can remember the truth that has been spoken to us through much prayer. We have been called to adopt, to care for God's children no matter their background, their country, their skin color.

My heart leaps at the thought. It may be years down the road, but nevertheless it is on my heart and mind each and every day. Your family is coming for you baby. You are wanted. You are loved. You have a Mommy and a Daddy and the best Big Brother ever, and we cannot wait to bring you home. Forever.